Honestly, I really don't like missing church. Not because I want my name checked off on our class roster, but because I really look forward to singing, learning, and fellowshipping with God's people. It is the most edifying day of the week for me, and to miss it can be incredibly discouraging. I know there are others of you that can relate. Certainly, if you are a parent, you know from experience where I am coming from. Just when one child gets sick, another picks up the torch and, before you know it, you have missed three weeks in a row.
And while children usually recover from their illnesses in a relatively short period of time, there are others of you that are caring for a consistently or terminally sick spouse, parent, or family member and have missed many Sundays, with no real end in sight. For you, staying home from church is a given.
It can be tempting to be discouraged to the point where you wallow in self-pity, but let me encourage you with some things that the Lord has been teaching me through this season of motherhood and life that I hope will encourage you as well:
STAYING HOME FROM CHURCH TO SERVE ANOTHER HONORS GOD
As important as it is to be committed to going to church, it honors the Lord when you stay home to care for another person. If I neglect my sick children because of my desire to go to church, that is wrong. Jesus preached about the very problem in regards to the Pharisees. They loved keeping lists and commandments and going to the Temple, but they had absolutely no desire to serve others. In Matthew 23, Jesus says,"
"The scribes and the Pharisees sit on Moses' seat, so practice and observe what they tell you - but not what they do. For they preach, but do not practice."
"And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it
to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ Matthew 25:40
STAYING HOME FROM CHURCH TO SERVE ANOTHER HONORS THAT PERSON
The New Testament speaks to this idea a lot! Whether it coming from Matthew, John, Paul, or Jesus, it is clear that being a follower of Christ means putting the needs of others in front of our own. Let's face it, that is not easy to do, even on a regular basis. As a Mom, I am constantly putting my children's needs ahead of my own during the week (as I should). It can be tempting for me to think, "Yes, it is Sunday! I finally have three hours of unencumbered time to really worship (unless I get paged)". So, when one of my kids wakes up at 3:00 am vomiting, my selfish heart can sometimes be more concerned with what I think I am missing out on than seeing my child's sickness as an opportunity to honor her by serving her.
Plus, what a chance to share the Gospel with our children and loved ones when we serve them! My children are not saved. Some of you care for spouses or family members who are not saved. When they see us putting feet to our faith and serving them with a joyful heart, that can speak volumes! It may be humbling to do, but missing church to care for another will honor that person and point them to Christ.
"So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:1-5
STAYING HOME FROM CHURCH TO SERVE ANOTHER ALLOWS OTHERS TO SERVE
As much as I dislike the rule that bars my baby from the nursery the moment they see green snot, I understand why it is so important. It is very common for us to want to go to church, no matter what the cost. This means that, even though we know one or more of our kids really should be staying home, we bring them anyway because we don't want to miss church. We say things like, "Oh, he's really not that bad" or "She's almost over it, so it should be fine". Not only is this attitude unloving toward our children, but it is unloving towards other members of the church.
It is not a profound concept - when we bring our sick children to church, odds are other children will get sick. Workers will get sick. Anyone who hugs your child in love will probably get sick. Now, you have just created a chain reaction of sickness because you selfishly chose to go to church when you should be at home with your child. The result is that others will then have to stay home from church and will not be able to serve. I am by no means a hyper-health nut who thinks every time a child sneezes they should be quarantined for a month, but I do think we need to be more considerate of others in the church. I am also not suggesting that we can stop the spread of colds and flues completely, but what I am suggesting is more common sense when it comes to bringing children we know to be contagious to church because we don't want to miss a Sunday.
This is part of the sacrificial love of Christ. Laying down our needs for the needs of others. Trust me, I understand the frustration of missing church several weeks in a row and thinking that you will never get back into church, but don't purposely put others at risk for illness because of your desires (as good as they may be).
"By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But
if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet
closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth." 1 John 3:16-18
Finally, remember that just because you are not worshiping in church, does not mean you cannot worship at home. Serving your sick child or loved one is an act of worship to the Lord in and of itself, but, if you are able, there are other ways to worship at home. Many churches post weekly sermons online. You can listen to worship music. You can pray for your loved one's healing and God's grace. For you Moms, remember, this is just for a season. You will eventually be able to go back to church (I promise). For those of you who care for a sick loved-one long term, be encouraged to know that the Lord will bless your service and take advantage of the many resources the church today has. And while no amount of online sermons will replace true Christian fellowship, it is my hope that the Lord would give you opportunities to enjoy fellowship in another way.
Be encouraged to know that when you stay home from church to sacrificially care for another, you are fulfilling the greatest commandment of them all, and you can be sure that the Lord is pleased.
“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 25:36 - 40
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*NOTE: As a believer, going to church is essential! I am in no way suggesting that church is an optional choice for believers. The church is the bride of Christ - he loves her and gave himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25). When able, we should be in church. This post merely speaks to the times when we are unable to due to a sick child or loved one. Also, I address Moms, simply because I can empathize as a Mom, but I realize there are a lot of awesome Dads out there that sacrifice and stay home with their sick children so their wives have a chance to be in church. So, though I use the term "Mom" in this post, you can easily substitute the word "Dad"!
